Running with Axel

Today it's been two years since I received my transplant. Cells from a cadaver donor were injected into my abdomen to attach themselves to my liver and work as an improvised pancreas enabling me to a new life. Being part of a medical study, this is quite a goal post for me to reach, as it is to the extensive transplant team involved in my case. Unfortunately for my donors family, this day is not so happy a day for them. For them today only marks the loss of their loved one.

I have read of other organ transplant patents who have evolved after their surgery. Not only lifestyle, or changes of out look or even appreciation of a new healthy existence. I'm talking major personality transformation. Differences of preferences. I have learned of heart recipients who's eating choices change dramatically. Foods they used to dislike can become a new craving for them. It is often their donors favorite dish that they now desire. I have read of a lung transplant recipient who before listen only to heavy metal music that will only listen to classical music after their current organ. That patents new lungs came from an orchestra conductor. It is if a part of the donors soul resides in his actual flesh. Strong enough to make a change in it's new home.

Because of privacy regulations, I do not know about the person whom I received my cells from. Or the circumstances that lead to the family's decisions that they could let the hope for their loved ones future in this world go. But from the few sketchy facts I do know, I have a clear picture of him in my mind. And a name.

Axel is the name I have come up with. Axel because he is now a center of my being. It is a strong name, as strong as he himself must have been. Because I did not have to wait for transport time, when I got the call a match for me was found, I know he was from my home state. I imagine him a large young male, because it took a hearty donor larger than me to supply me with as many active live cells to produce the insulin my body required. And he had to be in good shape to be eligible to supply me with healthy tissue. It must have been an accident that made it possible for the pieces of him to be harvested in such a way. What a sorrowful shock to his family to lose him. I am saddened that he had to leave his body behind. But I thank God for giving him life.

I think of him when I eat my new love, fruit flavored Dots, the formerly despised candy I would not previously look at much less eat. The color blue is slowly replacing my once all red clothes closet. I am drawn to that color more and more often. Although I do not listen too or buy country music, my hand now hesitates on country channels while surfing for rock stations on the radio. And I dance. I dance all the time. It is hard now for me not to move when I ear music now. It is not only the quaility my life that has improved but the quantity.

But it is when I am quite and still that I feel him. When I am sitting and reading or like right now when I have my laptop pressed up against my gut I actually feel him move there. As if my sedimentary non movement offends him. And I can hear him. It is not my own conscious nagging me to exercise that I hear. It is a different voice all of his own. "Time to move now. Let's go. You are burning daylight."

Today I run for Axel. Today I run with Axel. Not only will we run. We will skip. And we will sing. C'mon Axel, lets go.